Am I alone in finding this story terrifying? Seems to me that this throws serious doubt on the alleged weight-loss properties of lettuce. But let me ask you this Newsround…whatever happened to Roberto?? The world of jumbo rabbits is clearly a fickle place – but some of us remember.
What is this insatiable desire to find bigger and bigger rabbits? I fear that behind it all is John Craven, with a napkin round his neck and traces of rabbit pie on his chin.
The fickleness of large rabbit lovers has been well documented in my travels.The large rabbit lover I speak of was both a lover of large rabbits and a large person.I never got to find out whether he was a large lover, before he passed from my life.He was one of my mother’s numerous squeezes, back in the day when her squeezes we numerous. But he didn’t last much longer than a sit down and a glass of wine.He was a paramedic. The kind who sits at the side of the road in an ambulance, eating donut upon donut, waiting to be sent off to resuscitate an unfortunate in a nearby part of town.In his leisure time he moonlighted as a vet-paramedic, and was called upon to go to a secret location in, I think, Hertfordshire, where the BBC was filming the phenomenon of the day, The Teletubbies.For that show, they utilized the largest rabbits they could find, so that Teletubby Land had that storybook quality.Only, he said, these rabbits, because they were so huge, had terrible heart problems. So we had to keep injecting them before every shooting day so they could survive the experience.They used to lose no end. It was the rabbit killing fields. He seemed pretty nonplussed about it.He was equally nonplussed when he stood my mother up the very next time they were due to go out. It was a close call for her, I think.
Leave rabbit lovers alone. It’s the dog lovers you need to be wary of. I used to work with a girl (lets call her Rowena) who had a three-legged rescue dog (i.e she had rescued it from a refuge. The dog – or bitch to be correct – was ineffective for any type of rescue herself, having only three legs.) One day, out of curiosity, dog-loving Rowena tasted the lactating ladydog’s breast milk.
Squirrels, editors, now rabbits -what’s all this about? Come on, lay off the rodents.
Do you live in fear of all living things?